I’m a Stay-At-Home Mom and I Sit and Eat Chocolate More Often Than You Think

It’s true, and I blame my daughter.

The stereotype goes that stay-at-home moms sit and eat bonbons all day. And sometimes watching soap operas gets thrown in.

When I was a mom of just one, I would laugh. My son was constantly on the move. There were warm days when we would take two walks a day. He loved going to the playground. He liked to run and jump, but had zero caution. The early years were always an adventure. I looked forward to his 50 minutes of speech therapy because it was the only real time I got to sit.

When my daughter was born, I seriously thought about just getting rid of the couch. Who would have time to sit? If one was always on the go, two were going to be on the go…in opposite directions. The couch was just going to get sad and lonely.

The first year with two kids was just like that. Both kids were constantly in motion. But something happened the second year, when my son turned 4. He discovered he didn’t always have to be doing something and it was okay to just sit, rest, and zone out for a bit. Okay. One kid down.

Not so fast!

My daughter was 1 and, having started walking at 11 months, the shine of being fully independently mobile had worn off. For some reason, mommy’s lap was all the rage.

Months later, at over 1.5, my daughter still can’t get enough of my lap.  She loves rolling around on me and doing her own form of gymnastics. And when she’s not squirming around, she just lies or sits on me. I think I’m her favorite chair. If I sit for a second, she’s trying to climb on me. If I’m holding her, she’ll contort herself to force me to sit down just so I don’t drop her. There are days when I’m constantly up and down and there are days when I’m stuck on the couch because this little person won’t let me up. But instead of soaps (I used to sometimes watch one with my mom and found it so laughably stupid that I now refuse to watch any at all), I watch PBS, and my husband and I are sure we enjoy Odd Squad more than our kids do.

Then there are the days when I’m sitting, but not serving as someone’s seat. Those are the days when sitting really means perching. My daughter loves chocolate, but she’s a complete disaster when she eats it. I’ve found chocolate smudges all over her body, even when she’s fully clothed. Chocolate sessions usually mean I sit and watch her like a hawk with a waiting wipe. She hates when I hover, but I would rather wipe chocolate off her than the floor, couch, walls, toys, TV…basically, anything within her short reach. And sometimes she takes forever to eat, so I get bored and eat some, too.

So, yeah, I’m a stay-at-home mom who sits on the couch and eats chocolate. Not every day, but enough that I notice.

    • kat

      Haha! I wish my kids liked Wild Kratts as I was a bit can of their first show Kratts Creatures, but they really only watch PBS because that’s all I let them have. Sometimes I don’t the tunes from Daniel Tiger and my kids stare at me like I have 2 heads.

      • Confession of a Parentless Mother

        I use the Daniel Tiger songs for everything. I even wrote a blog post about it but we use different ones now so I may need to write an updated version. 😂. I don’t blame you PBS is the best for learning. What else can you ask for? 😂

      • kat

        Sometimes I wish Daniel would have a total meltdown just to see how his parents handle it, but, gosh, that show is so on point with young children. If it were up to me, we would only have the PBS channels. Unfortunately, daddy introduced our oldest to Disney Junior and now my not even 2 year old demands “cartoons.” Nooooo!

      • Confession of a Parentless Mother

        Omg me too. I’m like how is he so calm after feeling frustrated?!?! My daughter is having a frustration meltdown. :/. I love them … NOT. I have a few shows I can deal with on Disney Jr and Nick Jr, but some I’m like yup we’re not watching this.

      • kat

        Yes! And his parents are so patient and never flustered. How? Just how? Yeah, some non-PBS shows aren’t bad, but others make me ask who thought that would be a good thing for kids to watch? I know my kids get bored, but PBS will always be better and if they don’t want to watch TV they can play with all their toys.

      • kat

        WHAT?! That’s so scary! I usually monitor what they watch, but, gosh, now I may never let them watch anything again. They can just grow old watching Daniel, and maybe learn how not to tantrum.

  1. Nicole Alicia

    LOL! I am a SAHM also….I gotta try maybe sitting down and eating some Chocolate one day! Sounds therapeutic and maybe just what I need!

    • kat

      Oh, yes! It’s so hard to hide. I wonder how long it’ll take them to realize I shoo them out of the kitchen not to clean up but to enjoy some chocolate.

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