Well, that was fast. My first blogging break of the year is here. I contemplated whether I should continue to take breaks every 6 or so weeks and decided that, yes, I should. Not only do they give me a bit of breathing space, but it gives me time to really turn my focus back to my family. Also, as an introvert, interacting with people, even if it’s over the Internet, is exhausting and I really need to recharge. The most important thing I learned I needed to do was to just take some time to pause, to stop, to come to a standstill so I can look back and…
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Finding Magic in Motherhood, Part 12: The Relief That Came From Telling My Secret
I was always afraid that, because I’m skinny and petite, I would start showing early on. I was lucky winter went on and on into March that year since my warmer, winter specific dresses tended to be looser than my summer dresses. My closet was also full of colorful scarves my mom had made me over the years, which made it easier to shift attention to my neck. Between them and my coat, no one who didn’t already know knew. Originally, I had intended on telling my classmates once I passed the 12 week mark, but, having miscarried, I was afraid I would lose this, too, if I shared my…
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Finding Contentment by Redefining Motherhood
About two years ago, I brought this blog back to life after a, well, too long unscheduled hiatus. My first post back in 2018 was about how I came to be a stay-at-home mom. Back then, I was certain I wouldn’t stay a stay-at-home mom forever, that I wouldn’t be doing anything other than documenting my journey into becoming a working mom. I was quite insistent that being at home was not going to last. But life happened and life made changes without consulting me and now I find I’m exactly where I had never wanted to be. But, perhaps, I’m actually exactly where I’m supposed to be. Didn’t Want…
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Some of My Favorite Moments as a Mom
I’ve now been blogging consistently for 2 years. Two years ago I decided one of the things I would be writing about was motherhood. I never intended on actually sharing too much about my kids as I’m really serious about protecting their privacy, but, once in a while, I can’t help but document a small slice of their childhoods. Two years ago, my son was 3 and my daughter was about 8 months old. That means there’s actually quite a bit of their young childhoods that have been documented in some way. here While I don’t really talk about them much, I do talk a lot about how I’m raising…
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The Lily Cafe Digest #7
It’s that time again! Time for a break. Since my son will be off from school for the next 3 weeks, I’ll be taking the time off as well. Once again, this Digest comes at the start of my break, so I hope you understand why I’m not allowing comments. I don’t plan to be anywhere near WordPress for the next 2 weeks, though I’ll be around to write my upcoming posts during the third week, so I may stop in and say hi. My last break came after 9 weeks of blogging, so I was a little caught off guard when the past 3 weeks just sped by. In…
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The Bloggers I Love: Moms Edition
Over the past two weeks, I’ve been sharing some of the bloggers I adore. First I talked about the absolutely beautiful and authentic souls I’ve had the great honor to “meet” here. Then I shared some writers/authors and book reviewers I enjoy every chance I get. Now it’s time for me to share some of the mothers I enjoy reading. Unfortunately, this was a bit harder to do as mom bloggers have a tendency to vanish from the blogging world, so, even though I enjoy a number that have come and gone and come and gone again, I’ll just be sharing the ones who post more often. I Didn’t Want…
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Finding Magic in Motherhood, Part 11: I Don’t Believe in Stress
When I learned I was pregnant with my son, I was also somewhere in the middle of my seventh year of formal study in psychology (third year of graduate school). I knew the effects of a mother’s stress on a developing child. Knowing I’m generally an anxious Type A person, it was important to me that I minimize the risk of anxiety in my child. Neither my husband nor I have any known relatives who have ever been diagnosed with anxiety, so I was just keen on minimizing the risk of him developing even a normal level of anxiety. In order to keep my cortisol levels as low as possible…
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Finding Magic in Motherhood, Part 10: School and Pregnancy
I had about a week between the ultrasound and the start of my Spring semester, a week to finally let the thought I was pregnant settle in. Of course, that came with a whole host of other fears. I still wasn’t past the first trimester, so there was still a good chance I would lose this baby, too. But my more pressing issue was having to sit in classrooms for most of the day twice a week while battling nausea and keeping my symptoms under wraps. I was lucky. The first trimester was kind to me. It was almost as though the universe decided I’d gone through enough with my…
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And a New Phase of Worry as a Parent Has Begun
Parents understand worry very well. Not only is the world a scary place, but babies and young children are just so fragile. I remember worrying about my kids when they were both newborns. SIDS terrified me and, since both were born early, both were slightly more likely to succumb to it. When my oldest learned to roll over just before he turned 6 months, he loved sleeping on his face. I spent a very sleepless week worrying about him. I slept with the monitor glued to my ear. I got up every 10 minutes to check on him. All night. Every night. Then the kids started to crawl and walk…
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The Damaging Effect a “Perfect Mother” Can Have on a Daughter
A perfect mother is a woman who can cook, clean, care for her kids, love her husband, and get involved with the community with a seemingly unlimited amount of energy, good will, and a boundless grace. Not only does she dress well, but her kids are dressed well and are always on their best behavior in public. Her marriage is the stuff of dreams. She bakes and volunteers at her children’s school(s). Maybe she works, and maybe she doesn’t, but, whatever she does, she does it all with a smile and timeless grace. I mean, in some ways, maybe it’s appealing. I don’t know about you, but it just sounds…
